Raw Honey + Lemon Cold Syrup

Greetings from the deep, dark depths of the nasty cold/cough household, which we shall be called henceforth until we are all healed. Three days back into the school year and Jeremiah caught it. Then a few days later on my Mom's fiftieth birthday over Moscow Mules, I caught it. The next day Olivia caught it. Three days later Isabella succumbed. My sister was visiting and both her and my niece came down with it. And it finally caught up to Jeremy a few days ago. You know it's a strong one when every single person goes down one by one.

It's been a blast and half up in here for the past 16 days. What with all the not sleeping at night due to having a newborn and not being able to take cold medicine because of the nursing, and trying desperately not to infect Ellie. At least the weather has been cooperating. It's been raining and thundering for days and days. Perfect curl-up-in-a-blanket-and-drink-tea-and-eat-soup-weather. I had it the worst - I'm still coughing and on day 12- and not being able to take anything to relieve symptoms was really sad until I remembered this raw honey and lemon cold syrup I had made last Spring for such a time as this. Yes, last Spring. It keeps a long time in the door of the refrigerator which is super convenient. Take five minutes, make this now, and you'll have it whenever you need it.



Raw honey is excellent for sore throats and coughs because it contains anti-viral and anti-microbial properties. If a sore throat is caused by a virus, the honey will actually help rid any bacteria that may be lurking making it truly healing in and of itself. Raw honey is actually nutritious! Just make sure you buy real raw honey. That processed stuff you buy in most grocery stores won't have the same healing properties because it's heated to such a degree in processing that it kills off many of the beneficial components. Raw buckwheat honey is especially healing if you can find it. It's also gloriously dark and molasses looking. Honey also calms a cough by coating the throat and acting as a suppressant. Lemon and its juice contain vitamin C and help to boost the immune system. Together, this team can't be beat.

Make sure to use organic lemons since we use the skin in this recipe as well. You don't want toxic chemicals on the lemons because that would defeat our purpose, now wouldn't it?

I make the basic syrup and leave it in a glass mason jar in my refrigerator until I'm ready to make tea with it. Just add about a tablespoon of the lemon and liquid in the bottom of a mug and pour piping hot water over. Inhale the steam and drink the tea! Voila!




There's lots of ways to adapt this too. Try adding to your cup:


+a few shavings of fresh ginger root, or a few shakes from your spice shelf.

+a shot of Crown Royale or whiskey for your own version of NyQuil- this is old timey.

+a tablespoon of raw coconut oil - it's immune boosting, anti-viral and especially comforting to a sore throat.

+A teeny tiny pinch of cayenne pepper to help open nasal passages


You may also take this by the spoonful instead, although hot liquids are super beneficial for colds so you may prefer to make the tea.

This tea helped me out tremendously while taking care of my little honey baby, Eleanor:




I love the way my mason jar looks filled with thick golden honey and lemon slices. It makes me want to dive in and use right away, but I know I need to be patient. It'll be a couple of days before the honey and lemon juice get acquainted, thin out, and turn into a pulpy, rich marmalade of sorts. It should keep well in the refrigerator for 3 months.



Raw Honey + Lemon Cold Syrup

1 mason jar (Any size, although I used a smaller one)
organic lemons, cut into small slices
Raw honey- buckwheat honey if you can find it

Fill your jar to the top with lemon slices. Pour honey into the jar until it reaches the top and covers lemons. Seal tightly and store in the refrigerator. Let it sit for a few days before using. It can be stored in the refrigerator for up to 3 months.

Ranch Style Chicken

So, I watch the E! show "Total Divas" now. I decided to just say it and get it out there since this is...how shall I put it? Oh yeah, very, very embarrassing. Last week I made the mistake of telling my sister that I liked this show. She laughed at me. My own sister, who watches "16 and Pregnant" and "Teen Mom" actually laughed at me upon learning this news. Then, she started referring to it as "my show"

As in: Krysta, your show is on. 

I'll admit, it's strange that I like this show. I'm not a WWE fan, but I admit I've succumbed to watching The Bachelor in recent years, and I do occasionally keep up with the Kardashians - although mostly because it comes on before E News and my exposure to that little five minutes towards the end was enough to eventually get me to watch a full episode without shame. Or maybe we watched a whole episode because Jeremy had so many questions about Bruce Jenner. Like, has he had a stroke? Or what happened to his face? Had he been burned in a fire? I promise these were legitimate questions we had. My sister laughed when I asked her those things too. Hard. Mostly because I was serious and concerned. When I learned the truth, that he had done this to himself, I googled what Bruce used to look like before plastic surgery. And then I got sad which involved me even more. And then I watched another episode. Hook, line and sinker.



I don't watch every episode of these reality shows because I don't like to be addicted to such things. I like to keep my distance if you will. Trash in - Trash out, you know? Up till now it's never really been a problem. But I'll be damned if I am not jonesing to watch this Divas show every single time it's on. It's so strange. I almost missed out on it too. I had been nursing the baby to sleep and unable to reach the remote control for three nights in a row when "Total Divas" aired. I was forced to watch and was so bummed the first two times it happened. I rolled my eyes and pouted in my head but had no choice. I was not going to jeopardize the baby waking up just to change the channel. After I got to know the characters by the third viewing, it was all over. I was hooked. I told Jeremy and guess what? He laughed at me too! It so doesn't seem like a show I would watch. Now he makes fun of me, calling it my "favorite show"

As in: Krysta, your favorite show is on

I'm sort of mortified.

If watching Total Divas is a guilty pleasure, this Ranch Style Chicken is definitely one of them too.  Every so often, we eat meat in this house. Organic, grass-fed meat, that is. This chicken is top notch, the bacon is nitrate free, and when it's marinated and grilled in a honey mustard-esque sauce and topped with melty good quality cheddar it's awesomesauce. I used an aged cheddar and loved the tangy flavor. If you use mild cheddar the cheese might get lost to the robust, sweet chicken which would be a shame. If you're going to eat this way make sure the food you are using is top quality, that's my advice anyway. I mean, how could you go wrong? It may not qualify as health food but it sure is good. Everything in moderation, right?

So, I guess that means I can't watch the Bella Twins in my "favorite show" tonight since I've watched at least an episode a day for the last week and that would not be moderate. That's it, I'm officially cut off. Unless the remote "accidentally" gets left on the other side of the room during nursing time tonight...




Ranch Style Chicken
adapted by The Pioneer Woman, Ree Drummond
serves 6

1/2 cup Dijon or county/grainy mustard
1/2 cup honey
The juice from 1/2 a lemon
1/2 teaspoon paprika
1/2 teaspoon salt
Crushed red pepper
6 whole boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 pound thick cut bacon
Sharp cheddar cheese, to taste
Olive oil

To begin, make the marinade. In a large bowl mix together the Dijon with the honey, juice of half a  lemon, paprika and salt and whisk until smooth. Sprinkle in some crushed red pepper flakes or cayenne if you like things a little spicy. Set aside.

Next, rinse the chicken breasts, place between two sheets of wax paper (or in a clear ziplock bag) and pound to around 1/2 inch thick with a mallet. Next, add the chicken to the bowl with the marinade, cover with plastic wrap and place in the refrigerator for 1 to 3 hours.

While the chicken marinates, fry up some bacon. When finished cooking, reserve 1/4 cup pf the bacon grease and clean out the skillet.

When chicken is done marinating, preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Remove the chicken from the fridge and pour off excess marinade. heat half the reserved bacon grease with an equal quantity of olive oil in the clean skillet over medium-high heat. (I only needed the bacon grease for this. It cooked nicely and didn't burn). When the grease is nice and hot add two or three pieces of chicken to it. Cook until brownish/blackish, about 1 to 1 1/2 minutes per side. Remove chicken to a large baking sheet.

Lay a few pieces of bacon over each chicken breast. Sprinkle shredded sharp cheddar cheese over the top of the chicken as generously as you like. Place pan in the oven for five minutes until cheese is melted and bacon is sizzling. Serve immediately.

Mayan Black Thunder Chocolate Shake (The Healthiest, Yummiest Thing Ever)

Plus



Equals the BEST most HEALTHY Chocolate shake around. Guaranteed.

The thing about having a new baby is it makes you question EVERYTHING. Is my baby getting enough milk? Should I pump? How can I keep up my milk supply when she'll only eat for five minutes before konking out for another hour at which point she'll wake up hungry but...you can't feed her because your trying to keep her on a 2 1/2 to 3 hour schedule so she'll actually eat a decent amount when it's time, thus keeping your milk supply in check, thus ensuring she's getting enough, thus ensuring she is satisfied for another three hours. Did that even makes sense? Can I google that? Is the sky blue? etc, etc. The problem is the baby doesn't ever cooperate with keeping a schedule even if it's for their own good and the doctor wants them up to her original birth weight by the next time you see them and the pressure is on. Babies don't yield to pressure. It was all on me. Thanks a lot, Eleanor. Luckily, she did get up to her birth weight and then some by the time she needed to. She is very advanced, you see. And also, very plump.



You can tell these two are my daughters. The baby because she looks like me (glory be!) And the one on the left because of her pose. Sheesh.

I read an article on DadSpin that made me laugh out loud. Concerning newborns, the new dad writes about how a baby's life consists of only sleeping and eating, but they can be shockingly inefficient at both. It's worth the read, if only to laugh out loud. By yourself. And then read the entire thing again to your spouse, because like I said, it's that funny.



Now that we've almost reached the two month mark, these questions, as annoying as they were to ponder seven times a day with each feeding, was less stressful this time around. I knew there would be a learning curve and it might be frustrating at times as I get to know my babys needs the first few weeks. But at the end of the day? I feel more chill about it. The baby is fed and happy. I am not stressed about a to-the-minute schedule, yet I'm willing to sacrifice the comforts of snack feeding for now to keep her on track since it will be mutually benefitting for both of us in the end. I've found all my babies and myself have thrived with some kind of scheduleing. Now to tackle the nap schedule...



Ellie is a sweet little thing with a great disposition. Still, girl likes to eat, and regardless of my easygoing attitude towards feeding, I do have to make sure I keep my milk supply up since it's been a bit of a struggle in the past. So, I've been mindful to drink plenty of water and eat nutrient dense food (and the blueberry muffins that my neighbor bought me because, obviously). One of the things I'm mindful of is my trace minerals. Cacao is an awesome source of trace minerals plus one of the best sources of antioxidants there is, so I've been making our Mayan Black Thunder Chocolate Shake as often as possible since I've been home. It's an awful name, but it's become a bit of a joke in our family so we keep calling it that. In all reality, it's the healthiest chocolate drink I know, packed with healthy fats, including coconut oil (which makes your metabolism burn extra hot), antioxidants, vitamins and minerals, with no added sugar. Plus, it's delicious. It even sneaks in some roughage from kale leaves which you cannot taste at all- so yeah, I guess you could say this shake is utterly amazing. A rockstar in the health department, if you will. I'd call it a smoothie because every single ingredient is stellar for your body and makes you feel amazing, but it really is more of a shake. Icy, chocolatey, milky goodness in a glass. Sometimes I add fresh mint or mint extract for a twist. We've been smitten with this drink for over a year. I have no idea why I haven't blogged about it until now. I love it for breakfast or lunch. I avoid it as an after dinner dessert even though it's a shake because the cacao tends to keep me up at night.



One thing? You'll probably notice as you look through the list of ingredients that this drink packs quite a few calories, but hark! Every calorie does your body good, and keeps you full and focused throughout the day. If it's still concerning, you can always split one recipe between two people. It's a BIG shake. Me? I like the whole thing, baby. I feel like I could take on the world after drinking this thing. So yeah, If I can do that, I can certainly handle three kids, a baby, and endless milk supply questions. Cake, I tell you. Do you think If I keep saying it, it'll be true?

Mayan Black Thunder Shake
adapted from Jai Seed Cookbook, by Rich Roll and Julie Piatt

serves 1-2

1 banana
1 large kale leaf
1 tablespoon black chia seeds
1 tablespoon coconut oil
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/4 cup unsweetened coconut flakes
 1 1/2 tablespoons raw cacao powder
1 tablespoon cacao nibs
3/4 cup unsweetened almond or coconut milk
3/4 cup coconut water
2 cups ice

Blend all ingredients EXCEPT ICE in a powerful blender such as the vita mix on high until blended. Add ice and blend until just incorporated. (If you add ice right away it won't blend up right). 

If you are using a regular blender instead of a vita-mix, you'll need to add less ice. Add 1 cup at first and more as needed to get the slush you want. 

Cheers y'all!

Jeremy's Healthy Breakfast Bowl + A Birth Story

That was...rough
Facebook status. 9:58pm, July 7th

-Rewind-

7:25pm: Eleanor Hope MacGray is born

7:15-ish: I look at Jeremy between contractions and tell him pushing feels different this time. It's harder. It's taking a longer time. She must be big like they thought, I say. I'm very aware which was my goal, but I'm not sure I like it.

-Rewind-

4:50pm- Leave the house for the hospital. Contractions are anywhere from 1-4 minutes apart. Some come within 30-40 seconds of each other. On others a few minutes pass, but they are getting much more intense.

4:25pm: I pack my hospital bag because I haven't yet. I like to live dangerously.

5:00pm: Checking into the hospital. Does your stomach get bigger if your baby is bigger? That's my theory because, never, never, has it been *this* ginormous before. Hello!




5:30-ish pm: 5cm dilated

6:20pm: Jeremy tells me I've been in the tub for 45 minutes. I am shocked. It feels like 10 minutes. Again, I have no concept of time.

6:40pm: I am unable to talk much between contractions. I lay my forehead in my arms over the tub. I haven't needed to throw up yet (sorry) which worries me a bit since I have during transition during my other labors which, in my mind, is 7cm. Was I not there yet? How could I not be at 7? I am silently dreading each contraction and telling Jeremy how it's not restful between them even in the absence of pain. I can't articulate why that is. I am hot. I need cool wash cloths draped over my shoulders and sips of ice water every few minutes.

7:00pm: Sitting in the hospital tub telling Jeremy to get the nurse. Feeling lots of pressure.

7:06pm: 9cm dilated and my water just broke. I'm back in the bed, having transferred from the tub. Everything is intense. They tell me I'm close and that it's all happening so quickly. I am shocked. It feels like an eternity, not quick. They tell me I've only been out of the tub for 5 minutes. I have no concept of time. I notice the doctor dressing for delivery. Seriously? Is this happening now? They check me again. Paper thin I hear. I think I hear complete. They say I can push with the next contraction. With each subsequent contraction and push I think and say "oh, no." 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At 1:00pm that day I sent Jeremy on a 2hr mountain bike ride. I had contractions but didn't say anything to him  becuase I wasn't sure if they would slow down and stop or keep progressing. Plus, I knew that either way we'd have time. Earlier that day my sister sent me a text asking me if she should stay in town where she had been visiting just in case I went onto labor that day, or make the 2 1/2 hour drive back home. I sent her off, assuring her I felt fine and was convinced this baby had no intention of coming. Then, around 11:30am our little family left the house to get the car washed and purchase our diaper bag. Good thing to purchase since I had three contractions on our 10 minute drive home. I needed to start paying attention. Truth be told, I had my first contraction while eating Jeremy's breakfast bowl around 10am but didn't know it was the start of labor. Later, when I realized I was indeed in labor and that she'd be coming that day, I was super excited. I felt good.

Jeremy's Breakfast Bowl - My last meal before baby


I started to time my contractions at 2:10pm while I edited my last blog post on why I want to have a drug-free natural delivery. It's intimidating to edit such a post while you suspect you are in labor and about to face everything you've written about. Although, it did help get my head in the game. From 2:10pm to 3:00pm, contractions went from ten minutes apart to six minutes apart.

Like I said, it was rough. Fast and furious, but rough. It took hours for my body to really get going, but once it did, it kicked into high gear. I tried my best to keep up. I knew it would be this way, as it has been for all my labors, but this one was quicker still towards the end. I checked into the hospital at the perfect time. I was still perky enough to walk in and change from my black Lulu Lemon ruffle skirt and aqua blue workout top (I had "big plans" for walking that day) into my hospital gown. Then I answered all of my nurses questions, greeted the doctor, and got my IV, all with smiles, stopping only briefly to quiet down and breathe with each contraction which by now, were progressively getting worse. I didn't know from that point it would only be two hours until I had myself a baby.



And you guys? I did it. Drug-free and natural, just like I hoped! I was also pretty present throughout the experience which made time move at a strange, inconceivable pace and everything seem just a bit more surreal. I was very, very aware. This was my goal and I was completely resolved to taking it one contraction at a time, but it was getting tough. I had to keep refocusing on the present and getting through the contraction at hand and not think about what was next. When the time came for pushing, I didn't want to, which caught me off guard. I had wanted to with Jeremiah. But this time, It didn't bring relief. It felt unnatural even though there was immense pressure and the need to do it, all which bothered me. Something about pushing was harder this time. I told Jeremy that something didn't feel right, and it was very hard work, so "she must be big." Ellie was big, with a big head to boot, but she was also POS (face up) which makes pushing much harder. They told me this after she was born, but I knew something was up. I was just so...there. I can't say I liked it. And since I've been saying so, people have been responding with "but at least it was really quick." This, I've decided, doesn't mean anything. Had it not been as quick, it would also not have been so intense. Quick doesn't equal easy, lets just get that straight. Mmmmkay?



After she was born they placed her on my chest. They kept remarking on how big she was, but she looked itty bitty to me...until later when she suddenly looked gigantic and I wondered how in the world she had fit in my belly to begin with. You know the part after you have the baby and you think all is good until, like, two minutes later when all the cramping, stitches, teeth chattering shakiness, cold, soreness and flu like symptoms rush in? Well, being my fourth baby, they were all supremely heightened this time. I know these after effects notoriously get worse with each child a woman has, but still, I was quite in shock over the intensity of it. I had to keep asking if it was normal. I also was losing a bit more blood than expected and when they got me up to switch rooms I almost passed out twice. I guess you could say my body was ready to rest and recover already. I slept like it was my job that night...after pizza. My husband totally went out at 10pm and got us pizza from our restaurant.







Big brother and sisters coming to see the baby for the first time




So did I like natural childbirth? No. I didn't like or enjoy natural childbirth. But then again, I didn't expect to. Childbirth is -hard.freaking.work.- It's hands down the hardest thing I've ever done. I knew I wouldn't "like" it. I wanted to embrace it. And I did. That's what changes everything. I was able to embrace and face something that was taxing and brutal, with intentional boldness-battling my fears along the way, and came out victorious. Childbirth like this is the most exhilarating and terrible thing I've ever experienced. Although, ask me about it the same night and I'll tell you it was only terrible.  :) Overall, I was much stronger and in control this time around than with Jeremiah's natural birth. I had a sense of- you got this- in my head. I did have to battle my fear of being able to handle the pain with each contraction, and not get too far ahead with the what if's -What if I can't take the pain thirty minutes from now? What if it gets worse?- And that was my biggest mental hurdle.




Eleanor Hope MacGray was born at 7:25pm, on July 7th 2013, weighing 8lbs 7oz, measuring 20" long, and screaming. 

Eleanor: Shining Light

Hope: "Hope" is the thing with feathers -

             That perches in the soul-

             And sings the tune without the words-

             And never stops--at all-

             Emily Dickinson

Ellie didn't settle down for quite a while. I was worried I had a cryer on my hands. I was even more worried an hour later when she still hadn't stopped. She's still so new and tiny but I can already tell she is the sweetest thing I've ever laid my eyes on. I think she's an old soul. She's very alert and listens intently when you talk to her. She has me completely smitten. I quickly declared she was my "plump chicken" which sounds weird if you don't already know that I call each of my kids some sort of animal (Isabella's my lamb, Jeremiah -much to his dismay- is my pig, and Olivia is my dove. Although, most recently she gets called "dragon" for her guttural yells, plus she sleeps "in the dungeon" which is really just dramatic speak for "downstairs." It's a loving name, I swear.)

The kids came to see their sister about an hour after she was born but only stayed a few minutes since she was still crying at that point and I needed to feed her. Jeremiah was especially attentive to her, wondering aloud about her, gushing with pride. Olivia, surprisingly, seemed to know exactly what was going on and who the baby was, like she had been expecting her. She remains curious about Eleanor and wants to be right up next to her wherever she is. For the most part she knows to be gentle which is amazing. Livy seems older to me now. Isabella held her right away and couldn't wait to celebrate her arrival. In typical Isabella fashion, she walked right up to me in my hospital bed, eyes wide with anticipation, a sly smile on her face and asked rather excidedly and bluntly "so, did it hurt?"

Um...yeah, I guess you could say that.

Jeremiah, in his typical fashion, was more compassionately concerned about me. He made sure to check on me a few times during his brief visit to make sure I was okay. I smiled and assured him I was. 

My Grandma, me, my Mom, and Grandpa

In my last post I wondered what change I might see in myself for having chosen this process. I have no doubt the revelations will keep coming, but I've already noticed a instilling of one of life's greatest lessons. I knew and understood this logically before but now I can feel it as well. I know it. In a nutshell? This life is hard. And in this life we will have trouble. Somedays can feel like a marathon to get through, and other times I feel like a complete failure. --Hold up people, I'm about to get deep-- During my contractions I found myself singing this song in my head. It goes like this :"Lord I need you, oh, I need you. Every hour I need you" Then I would get annoyed and angry at the lyrics and think to heck with that! Every minute, every second, I need you in this particular case. The same is true in my everyday life. Sometimes you are not rescued from the storm. Rather, you are made strong enough to weather it. It's in how you handle these times that count. I will not always be rescued from the woes of my life. But I will be met in them. I don't have it all figured out, by any means, and I still fail at times - epically- but I have learned to find some amount of comfortableness by just sitting in the midst of the hard stuff and being able to take it in, feel it's weight, and fight the temptation for a "quick fix" in lieu of the "real fix." I've learned to take it one second, one minute, one hour (one contraction) at a time and wait for clarity or strength in the midst because I trust it will come. I can also battle any anxiety about the future when I'm able to just meet each moment as it comes and learn to trust that I am always a work in progress, but have faith that I'm working towards something good. I don't think it's about being able to "like" or "enjoy" natural childbirth or any pain for that matter, but rather, for me, it's about being able to be vulnerable enough to be taught and changed by it even though that often hurts. I don't need to run from the hard stuff. With help, I got this. 

Coming home from the hospital

First family picture

Big daddy, little baby

And? The wisdom tooth surgery I've been putting off for years because I'm too scared about being put under (I've never had surgery). Yeah. That's gonna be cake now. And, honestly? Like magic, I'm...wait for it----------not. even. scared. 

Boom!

I just blew my own mind.

My friend Kel  came to the hospital and took a lot of these pictures for us. She's the best. 

Hey, wanna have what I had the morning Ellie Hope was born? Let me answer that for you, because it is so, so good. Yes, you want what I had.





This is Jeremy's Healthy Breakfast Bowl. We decided to name it that since it reminded me of the polar opposite of Garth Brook's Breakfast Bowl, which consists of bacon, eggs, sausage, cheddar, tater tots, and cheese tortollini, and is probably the worst possible thing to fuel up on in the morning, at least to me. In contrast, Jeremy's breakfast bowl consists of a fried egg, refried beans, fresh salsa or tomatos, a sliced avocado half, sautéed spinach with onion and garlic, and a dollop of Greek Yogurt. A squirt of lemon, a sprinkling of garlic flakes and sea salt, and it's heaven! I love savory breakfasts and this one fills you up with tons of vitamins and minerals, fiber and protein. Sometimes Jeremy sprinkles some diced pickled jalapeño over his bowl to spice it up. Any way you do it, it's delicious. We even found a way to only dirty one pan and one bowl for the whole process. First you sauté the onions and spinach in a pan, then remove it to a bowl until you need it. In the same pan, fry your eggs and move them to the side when done (or into your serving dishes. Next, warm the beans through in the same pan while you slice your avocado and lemon. By the way? You need the lemon and garlic flakes (we use McCormick brand) and sea salt. It's not optional since it brings all the flavors together.

Jeremy's Healthy Breakfast Bowl
serves 4

1 5oz package of baby spinach, or one big bunch or regular spinach
1 yellow onion, chopped
4 garlic cloves, chopped
olive oil
butter, for frying eggs
4-8 eggs (I like one per person, but you may like two per person)
2 avocados, sliced
1 can Amy's refried black beans (this brand tastes so much better than others)
fresh salsa, like pico de gallo or chopped fresh tomatoes
Greek yogurt
lemon wedges, for serving
dried garlic flakes (spice isle)
sea salt

In a large saute pan over medium heat, add a tablespoon of olive oil and saute the onion until translucent, about 5 minutes. Add chopped garlic cloves and sauté another minute. Add the spinach and cover with a lid until wilted, about 5 minutes. Season with sea salt and transfer to another bowl.

In the same saute pan, fry your eggs over medium heat in a bit of butter until done to your liking. I like them over medium. Transfer your eggs to individual serving dishes. 

Warm the beans through in the same skillet used to cook spinach and eggs over low heat. While beans are warming, slice your avocados and divide them up between bowls. When beans are warmed, divide a scoop between the bowls. Next, add a dollop of Greek yogurt and scoop of salsa to each bowl. Squeeze lemon wedges over the spinach, avocado and yogurt. Sprinkle the entire dish with garlic flakes and sea salt. 

I try and get a little taste of everything in each bite.

Why I Want a Drug-Free Natural Birth

Because food is not on my brain since I'm 7 days past due...Forgive me.

Birth of Jeremiah

When people find out I actually have the desire to do birth drug-free, and have had another child the same way, the reaction is usually the same. Why in the world would I want to do that? Why would I put myself through the pain when it is unnecessary? Some people look at me like I'm crazy. Modern medicine is there for a reason after all, so why wouldn't I take advantage of it? In a nutshell, people in general do not understand why in the world someone would pick the hard way when there is a much easier way. 

I am not a masochist. I don't love pain. If I have a bad headache I take ibuprofen. I'm not against drugs to help alleviate pain when I am sick. It's just that a woman birthing a baby is not sick, she's in labor. I think that might be the difference for me. Honestly? I think there's a lot of needless confusion and fear about giving birth ( I recommend renting "The Business Of Being Born" for more on that).

I've had a drug-free natural childbirth before when I had my son, and if I'm being completely honest, my reasons were less than noble. I did it because my husband wanted me to and I wanted him to be proud of me. He saw the value in the experience back then. I didn't fully, but still I wasn't opposed. My need for approval can be great. It makes him sad to know that's why I did it now because we both know his love for me is unconditional and I don't need to prove anything to earn it. Ah, human flaws! I went in blind, trusting there was some value to be had somewhere, but not really understanding what or why. It was...hard. I remember gritting my teeth and barely getting through the whole thing. At the end I felt accomplished, like I had achieved something to be proud of, but just didn't know what. I was proud of my natural childbirth for years but I couldn't fully articulate why. I didn't feel superior to anyone else for having done it, but a part of me felt sad for the women I knew who didn't have the desire or get to experience the same, but I couldn't tell you exactly why.

I have an tendency to get very curious about certain things in life. When it happens, I become very well read on whatever it is and seek to understand it fully. Childbirth is one of the things I got passionately curious about. I like this about me. To me, it means I am alive and finding my own way in life, instead of living and doing things the way someone else says I should. For me, it allows for living life intentionally and purposefully which takes effort and work but also means I have a real reason and understanding for making the decisions I do, which I think is responsible. Sure, I can live life more passively and not ponder the questions that arise when I get curious, but that's not for me. I want to know why. I want solid reasons and belief for doing the things I do. So, why would I pick the hard way instead of the easy way in childbirth? Because it's worth it.

Because deep down, I believe I can do hard things. And I think going through life's hard stuff is what shapes us as people. Character if you will. Can I trust and be brave and strong enough to get through them? And if so, how well? What was the condition of my mind, body, heart and soul throughout the process? How scared was I? Did I need to be? I think these questions are worthwhile. It's one of the questions in my Christian life that gets raised again and again. I think embracing childbirth for all that it is (scary, hard, messy, beautiful, work, unpredictable) is a rare opportunity for growth. Because when things get hard down the road, when it really hits the fan, I can be confident in knowing, really knowing I can do it because I've already overcome in my hardest moment. That freedom and confidence throughout my life is totally worth it to me. In natural childbirth, every woman faces their darkest hour. You get to a place where you'd just assume die than go through with the rest of it. To choose to trust your body and endure, be steadfast, surrendered and determined is crucial. If you can do it then, in that moment when you're at your weakest, taxed and tested to the very depths of your soul...you can do it anytime you need to thereafter. That's pretty bad ass I think.  Personally speaking, the only person I cheat in choosing the easy way is myself. 

Feeling it with Olivia before the epidural

Is this for everybody? No, probably not. And any woman who has taken the time to evaluate what is most important for her at that time in her life has my utmost respect with her decision. Twice I've decided I just didn't have what it took to birth naturally and that's okay. Sometimes, being humans, we are just plain tired and our road has been too weary or we're not ready for such a thing. For my first baby, going au natural wasn't even an option. I would have not seen the point just like all the people I mentioned in my first paragraph. I didn't know the value to be had yet, and that's okay. I was twenty years old. Had I been forced to birth naturally back then, I can't say I would have been able to translate the hardness into anything beautiful or beneficial. I had to first be aware of the value to be had which came with time and life experience. As time went by, I started to see more clearly what exactly I had gained through my natural childbirth with Jeremiah. 

A few years ago I had to do a two-month long sugar cleanse (basically vegan, no wheat, dairy, fruit, or anything that turns to sugar in the body). For a foodie like me, with no prior experience with limiting any particular foods, it required determination, steadfastness, endurance, trust that I was doing what was best and a will to choose to stick with it day in and day out and not give into temptation and no-no foods. It seems lame to compare a cleanse with childbirth but I'm telling you, each day on that cleanse I was tempted to eat something I shouldn't and would get discouraged thinking about how long it would be before I could have normal food again (two months is a long time!) I felt very defeated, so I would tell myself this: Don't think about tomorrow or how long this will last, just focus on today and this meal. Determine to choose the right thing today and win this particular battle, and eventually, before you know it, you'll win the war. Dramatic? Yes. Effective? You bet. I realized at some point that I probably wouldn't have had the willpower to see the cleanse through had I not gone through the experience of natural childbirth. If I had, it would definitely have been a lot harder with many more "cheats". As the years have gone by since then, I've experienced and been put in several situations where I can directly correlate how successfully I handled myself or had a victory over something using what I learned I could do in natural childbirth. The list is endless. I've had enormous benefit even though I initially went in not knowing what I would come out with. And? At my husbands suggestion we gave our son the middle name Ethan, which means strong and enduring, after me in childbirth. Pretty nice perk if I do say so myself. 

I chose an epidural with my third baby, Olivia. I went into labor not knowing if I wanted to do it naturally or not and that's ultimately what sealed my fate. When I arrived at that do or die moment, I wanted relief. You'll always choose relief and comfort if your not determined otherwise, and you know what? That's okay too. There's no point in doing something hard for no good reason at all and at that point in life I was tired. 

If everything goes my way, this baby will be the first time I choose to go into a drug-free birth knowing exactly what I am doing and why. Barring any complications, I'm glad I get the chance. 

Jeremiah

I am really curious as to what I'll learn going into it willingly this time. I plan on taking it a step further and not just trying to "get through it" but be present and not shaken as well. My body is able to deliver a baby naturally and women everywhere have been doing it for centuries. The calm and control it will require will almost bury me, I'm sure of that. But I'm determined to take it one contraction at a time. One small win at a time...and eventually, I'll win the war. In the end, it may not be as gracefully or as picturesque as I see it in my head, but that's okay. There are lessons to be learned everywhere and places to be revealed to grow and I welcome that. My goal is to do the best I can with what I have. That's all anyone can hope for, right?

Grasshopper Pie

A little while ago my little man tore out this picture in a magazine and ran up to me with eyes wide "Mom! We have to make this!"



I filed it away with promises of getting the ingredients at the store, but weeks went by and I never did.  Finally, last week he saw me making my grocery list and ran to get the recipe from my drawer "Oh, mom? Are you forgetting this?" So I piled the cart with ingredients for grasshopper pie, stuff like marshmallows, milk, whipping cream, green food coloring and Oreo's, all to Jeremy's dismay and much to the kids delight.

I was very glad to be able to make this with him before the new baby comes and my time will be even more limited. He was very proud of his green pie and loved that "grasshopper" was part of the name. He toted it inside my grandma and grandpa's house last week for a family get together and took the first piece come dessert time.





Cool and fluffy, green and minty, sweet and milky, grasshopper pie is a classic and should make an appearance on your table this summer if you have kids. We used a recipe from a kids magazine so it called for mint extract and coconut extract for flavorings instead of the usual creme de menthe and cream de cacao. I don't recommend this as my first choice because it tastes better using the liquers, and there is not enough in the recipe to hurt children. Made with the extracts it was a little sharper tasting and my daughter thought it was a bit too much like the flavor of toothpaste (but in all fairness she uses a fresh mint Tom's toothpaste, so it probably did). So, use the liquers if possible for a more sophisticated flavor.



Well, I'm officially two days past my due date. I had an ultrasound and non-stress test yesterday and all is well and I am fit to carry this baby a little while longer. But...They are pretty sure this baby is big. Like, 8lbs 7oz big, and putting weight on rapidly by the day. This is by far my biggest baby. Isabella was 7lbs 15oz, so we know I can deliver an 8lb baby, but my doctor is a little concerned with it getting too big if I go a week past my due date. We'll at least wait until I'm a week past my due date to even consider inducing, and then we'd only consider that if the baby was getting too big. I'm generally against inductions unless there is an emergency or the baby is in danger. However, if I let the baby get too big I risk having to have an emergency c-section so I have to weigh what's worse.

Hopefully it doesn't come to that and she just decides to make an appearance before then. After all, my original due date was June 24th before they moved it to the 30th based on ultrasound measurements. Come on baby!!!



Grasshopper Pie
adapted from The Pioneer Woman, by Ree Drummond and Family Fun Magazine
makes 1 9" pie

• 17 whole Chocolate Sandwich Cookies (we used Oreo's)
• 3 Tablespoons Butter, Melted
• 24 whole Large Marshmallows (or Container Of Marshmallow Fluff)
• 2/3 cups Half-and-half or whole milk
• 2 Tablespoons Creme De Menthe Liqueur (more To Taste)
• 2 Tablespoons Creme De Cacao Liqueur
• Drop Or Two Of Green Food Coloring (I think we used 3)
• 1 cup Heavy Cream
• Extra Cookie Crumbs, For Sprinkling

Throw the cookies and melted butter into a food processor and pulverize (or, if you have some aggressions or energy to expend, you can crush them in a large Ziploc bag.) Pour into a pie pan and press into the bottom and up the sides of the pan. Set aside.

Heat marshmallows and half-and-half in a saucepan over low heat, stirring constantly. As soon as it's all melted and combined, place saucepan in a bowl of ice to cool down quickly. (Stirring occasionally will hasten this process.) Or put in the refrigerator for 15 minutes. Once cool, add creme de menthe and creme de cacao. Taste and add more creme de menthe if needed. Add one to three drops green food coloring. Place back in the refrigerator to cool for another 10 minutes.

In a mixing bowl, beat whipping cream until stiff. Pour cold marshmallow mixture into the whipped cream and fold together gently. 

Pour filling into chocolate crust (note: you might have a good 1/2 cup filling left over, depending on the size of your pie pan!) Sprinkle extra chocolate crumbs over the top. Place pie in the freezer and freeze until very firm, at least two hours.

Remove from freezer ten minutes or so before you want to slice and serve.